“I did have a drinking problem: Southern Comfort tasted quite nice; ordinary Comfort tasted like fabric softener.”
Milton Jones: Milton Jones and the Temple of Daft Assembly Hall
Revealed: Nine of the Funniest Edinburgh Fringe Jokes So Far!
The competition to be crowned Edinburgh's funniest is hotting up
The Edinburgh Fringe has become the place for comedians to compete to be the funniest around. Every year since 2009, Dave have even handed out a ‘funniest joke’ award! As the festival heats up, we’ll get you in the mood by revealing some contenders for funniest Edinburgh Fringe jokes.
Try your best not to laugh at the Funniest Edinburgh Fringe Jokes!
One-liner king Tim Vine has won the Edinburgh Fringe Funniest Joke award twice!
Let’s take a look at previous winners of ‘Dave’s Funniest Joke of the Fringe’ since the award began in 2009.
2014: “I’ve decided to sell my Hoover … well, it was just collecting dust.” – Tim Vine
2013: “I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa.” – Rob Auton
2012: “You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks.” – Stewart Francis
2011: “I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.” – Nick Helm
2010: “I’ve just been on a once in a lifetime holiday. I’ll tell you what, never again.” – Tim Vine, again.
2009: ” Hedgehogs – why can’t they just share the hedge.” – Dan Antolpolski
Who are the contenders for the Edinburgh Fringe Funniest Joke this year?
#9
Milton Jones
Katherine Ryan
“I’ve gone full-blown Bruce Jenner. I’ve always wanted to look like one of the Kardashians… I’m not even mad it’s the Dad.”
The Stand 3
#7
Bridget Christie
“Eddie Izzard is a straight man who identifies as a man, who likes to dress as a female estate agent from the Eighties.”
Stand 1
#6
Andrew Lawrence
“I feel sorry for Islamic terrorists. How many heads do they have to chop off before people in the West accept that Islam is a religion of peace?”
Assembly Roxy
#5
Brett Goldstein
“Operation Yewtree, it seems to me, is where the police sit around with a s*** load of box sets from the 1970s and ’80s and just tick off the cast lists one by one.”
Pleasance Beneath
#4
Phil Wang
“[At the next election] I’m voting Ukip, just to see where they send me back to.”
Pleasance Upstairs
#3
Stewart Francis
“Recently in court, I was found guilty of being egotistical. I am appealing.”
Assembly Rooms Ballroom
#2
Mark Nelson
“Jesus fed 5,000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread. That’s not a miracle. That’s tapas.”
Gilded Balloon Sportsman
#1
Glen Wool
“You ever seen a picture of Silvio Berlusconi? He looks like a thumb with a face drawn on.”
Glenn Wool: Creator, I Am but a Pawn
Assembly George Square Studio Three
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